Well, first change... not a big one.
When I went to the doctor and found out abuot my ocular migraines, I had a whole eye exame thingy done. And I decided that I should upgrade my glasses, I haven't gotten new lenses in about 18 years.
I'd say that they talked me into it, to make them look like the bad guys, but I decided on my own.
So, I just picked them up, and now I'm back to wearing glasses again. At least until I get tired of them (probably in about a week).

And I couldn't have done this at a better time. My left eye was bugging me all day today. At least I didn't have to keep taking my contacts out, right?
Well, I come home to find out that my mother has pink eye. Being as contagious as it is, guess what I'm thinking I have. My eye looks fine, unlike my mothers (her eye looks like something out of a horror movie).
We'll see what I look like come morning. Hopefully the irritation in my eye will just go away, but if it looks like it'd been pulled out and shoved back in with a razor... well, I'll probably freak.

I'll get a picture of me with my new spec's on here someday, hopefully soon.

Alone.
This is how I feel most of the time.
Sure, I have friends that care about me, and I car about them too.
The people I work with like me (just last week, one woman thanked me for "being you." I'm guessing that means I'm liked).
I have a loving (though insane) family willing to help me out when I could be living in a roach infested apartment in Caprini Green.

But still I feel alone.

I've met a bunch of women, been on seveal dates, but... blech.
So many times I just feel like there's nobody out there for me. The greatest potential for a second date was the spitting image of my ex... a very creepy blind date.
I've been chasing someone with the same name as the ex, and that's wierd too. I thought she'd been playing hard to get, but recently I've become certain that I was wrong.

There's only one thing I really want out of life.... friends, family, job... it all means nothing without someone to share it with.

At 12:49AM Saturday, the Spring Equinox occured. A time for beginnings... I asked for help. It's time I change. I'm not sure what about me to change, but something needs to change. I think it's the only way for me to find someone that makes me happy.

Maybe it's depression talking, I don't know, I don't feel depressed... just alone.

It's been a year and a half since I've had a migraine.
Well, that's a lie... it's been about 12 hours since I've had a migraine.
I haven't had one since before I started my new job (I'm talking REAL migraine, not a dizzy spell that I suspected might be a migraine), although in the past two weeks I've had 3.

These ones are... different. Yesterday , it started while I was reading a co-workers (Peter) trivia calander. The question was, "what was the last Chinese dynasty?" My answer, was the Ming dynasty, but that's because it's the only one I know of.
Of course, it's really the Qinn dynasty... I should have known. Anyway, I'm looking at the word Qinn, and it looks all weird. I can see the dot over the "i" but I can't see the little stick part of the "i." It look at it for a while before determining that the calander just has a really bad font and I go back to my desk.
So, I'm checking this order, using my finger to keep my place... and I realize that I can't see my finger. I can see it in some places, but not in others.
So I announce to my coworkers that "something is amiss."
Then I notice that, just on the edge of my peripheral vision, everythings going wacko. The only way I can think to describe it is like thousands of multicolored maggots writhing around just behind my vision. It was only in my left eye, at least.
I took my contact out, cleaned it, rubbed my eyes, and maybe an hour later it went away. Everyone said, "go to the doctor...'
But those regular readers of this page know that that wasn't going to happen.
Then I got a headache, and it got worse and worse. It *felt* like a migraine, but wasn't nearly as strong. Sure, it hurt like hell, but I could still concentrate.
I didn't leave work because one of our printers was taking us to lunch at a country club, and I was NOT going to miss that.
By the time the lunch thing started, I was feeling better... I still had the nauseous feeling and the shakes I would always get from a migraine, which was embarressing because it was buffet style, and I was shaking in front of everyone.
By the time lunch was over, I felt fine.

On the way to work today, I started getting a bit dizzy, out of the corner of my eye everything looked like I was looking through waves of crystal clear water. And I could tell there were areas I could not see at all.
So, with my trusty cell phone, I called in sick, and made an appointment with the eye doctor.
The headache came much faster, and much stronger than before.
Good old Dr Chavin did a bunch of tests (including a routine eye exam, which resulted in my spending $300 for new glasses).
What I've been having is "occular migraines" (maybe it's ocular, the other way seems to involve voodoo or something). He said if they continue I should go to a GP, who will send me to another doctor to take care of.
I'd considered going to a GP first, but I knew I'd have better luck finding out if I was going blind with an eye doctor.
Hopefully I won't have them anymore... but we all know that's not going to happen.
But if I do get another one, I'm actually going to go to a doctor again.