Eleven hours before I leave, and I can't find my compact camera. I really don't want to bring my good camera, unless I can be guaranteed a comely lass, naked in my hotel room. But I'll be sharing a room with Kodo, and I shudder to think about that.

Kodo

hrm... at 6AM Friday morning I leave for a weekend in fabulous Austin, Texas... where the food is as close to ambrosia as humanly possible.
I've done absolutly nothing as far as plans for this... I still need to wash the clothes I want to wear, and get a hotel room for one night.... and who knows what else.
The plan is to panic tomorrow night and race around getting everything done. I've got a list, all I need to do is implement it.
But... this is how I do things (all though I don't usually have a list), and they usually turn out all right... let's hope it works out for the best, otherwise I'll be sleeping under someone's car.

I was told by a certain waxing and waning individual, that a whole slew of folks were going to Austin for this weekend... but it seems that just about everyone backed out. So I'll be the only out of towner there... I don't know, I just feel weird about that. But hey, I'm not going to pay $100 to cancel my tickets... and I wouldn't mind seeing the friends I've made there.
It'll be fun... and if not I shall have a very sour look for that certain individual that did a great job talking me into this.

Secret hidden message:
Actually it took very little convincing me to go... I loved Austin last March or May or whenever that was. But don't tell Luna that... after all her hard work to get me to go, she'd kill me if she knew that all it took was the invitation.

Pain is master. Everything else is fantasy.

- Sean Stewart, Galveston

I am a zombie today.
Everything feels as if I'm living in a dream...
I hope it's not a dream, because this has been a fairly crummy day.

At least that damn thing in my eye is gone... whatever it was.

Still a rock-like object inhabits my eye. If I wear my contacts I get a headache. I've tried flushing it out, but I have this thing about water in my eyes.

Perhaps tonight, the sandman will come to pluck out my eyes and rid me of this horrible feeling.

Gross gross man, with a bone

My friend Rob is a fellow "photographer." A few weeks back he came up with the idea to go to the Morton Arboretum to catch the fall colors. The plan was to go this weekend.
Of course, since it was his plan, he decided to go to Florida instead.... so it was just me, and Gay Nick.

For once, I decided NOT to try to get there early to get the good morning light, and we went for evening light instead. This was a good plan, because the morning clouds didn't let much light in. And as it was the clouds didn't cooperate, but they never do.

The cold, dry weather lately, did not contribute to beautiful browns, reds and yellows. And, in fact, almost all the trees still had green leaves on them, despite the fact that most of the leaves were already falling off.

Take only pictures, leave only footprints
This common sign is placed throughout the arboretum, but when you found what I found... you'd ignore it too!
There was this fallen tree crossing a river, I hopped up (narrowly avoiding all the crap on it), to take some pictures.
Then Gay Nick took his turn, I took a couple of shots while he played on the dead tree. Then I waited... and waited... and waited for him.
I noticed a very oddly shaped "thing" buried in the rot of the dead tree.... and I started to pick at it, and eventually managed to pull it out. I'm not 100% sure.... but it sure looks like a vertebra.
Preliminary tests lead me to believe it's definately a bone of some sort. There's no way it's human, that's for sure. And I don't think it originally belonged to the tree, but I could be wrong.
You would not believe the troubles I had trying to find some kind of worker that wasn't just directing cars in the parking lot. And in the end I took the damned thing home... I know a guy that knows all about dead animal (especially insects), he'll tell me what it is.

Afterwards, I was a fool. I opted to take my film to Walgreens and thier one hour film lab. I have nothing against one hour photograhps, they come out as good as any other.
Sure, I could have done it myself, but I don't do color... and getting autumn leaves required color... even if they were all green.
My problem with going to a one hour place is that you always have to have your prints on glossy paper.
Pictures on glossy paper are crap. Every finger print remains there until the end of time, the oils slowly eating at the image. You can't remove a finger print from a glossy picture.... ever.
Matte prints you can touch all you want, smear peanut butter and jelly all over them, and it washes right off. Hell, the pictures even look better on matte paper. Why anyone would want everyday photo's on glossy paper is beyond me

So we watched Animaniacs while we waited for our pictures to develope.

One hour later, we were back at Walgreens, and $40 later, I had my pictures. Speed is nice, glossy paper isn't. Even without really good light, or a wide range of colors, I managed to snap off a few good shots... but 5 rolls of film should yeild 20 usable shots.
My problem is (and I seriously need work on it) that I look for one aspect of a shot, and ignore everything else... so when I get the picts back, I see that I cut off something on the oppostide side of the frame, or added in something that just doens't work with the main image. But still there are a few good shots I'd be happy to stick to my parents fridge.

I got a headache while walking with the trees. Why? Well, late Friday, I felt something fall into my eye. I couldn't get it out, and it's still there. I can still feel it. But this thing and my contacts didn't mix well, and after a few hours it hit me like a migraine.
By the time I got home, all I could do was lay down. Two hours later, I decided to post this... it's taking forever for me to write, so I'm done now... I need more sleep, and less headache.

Your homework assignment for the week.
Walk up to a stranger that's coming out of a church. Ask them which cult they belong to
Post their responses here.


And for those who don't know (from www.webster.com):
Etymology: French & Latin; French culte, from Latin cultus care, adoration, from colere to cultivate
Date: 1617
1 : formal religious veneration : WORSHIP
2 : a system of religious beliefs and ritual; also : its body of adherents

This is Jacki:



Jacki is my new enemy. Here's why:

Me: Well, we know you're a geek.
Jacki: I'm not a geek!
Me: Don't worry, I'm a geek too. I just hide it...... poorly.
Jacki (not even trying to defend my own inadequacies): Why do you hide it?
Me: How else do you expect me to get chicks?
Jacki: You get chicks??!

It wouldn't have been so bad if she didn't say it loud enough for the entire office to hear. But head swiveled like turrets and all eyes were on me as my eyes welled with tears and my lip began to quiver. All I could do is run back into my cubicle and cower in the darkness, hiding my shame.


Today at work, the game was "pop the balloons and win a prize." I managed to get a balloon on my first try, while Jacki took almost a hundred tries. HA! She didn't win anything, and it serves her right.
umm... well, I didn't win either. But I could have used that day off with pay!
The gimmick of the day was "wacky ties." I manage to wear 4 different ties that changed every 2 hours. They had cute animal patterns on them, and the very bottom had the head of the animal (zebra, toucan, cheetah, and tiger). Clearly, I should have won whatever funtastic prize was being given away.
But nooooo.... the winning tie had Elvis on it *rolls his eyes*. It didn't even sing or dance or anything. And who should be wearing it but the purely evil Jacki. And she lured it over my head, taunting me and calling me horrible names like "hunchback of a snivelling, little man," or "geek that don't get no chicks."
And I was forced to cry yet another river.

I thought I'd left all nemesis's behind when I took this new job. But it seems I've picked up a new one. Next year, Jacki the title shall be mine!!!

Today's customer service extravaganze was mismatched day! Everyone was supposed to wear clothes that doing match.
Being a guy, all I could do was wear to different socks... I tried different shoes, but I was so lopsided I really couldn't walk.
The game of the day was Wheel of Fortune.... two of my teammates were out for the day, and one had an important project that needed to be done, so it was just me and Fiona.... we tied for last place with 0 points....
The winning team each got a scratch and win lottery ticket, one two dollar winner, and one twenty five dollar winner... sigh... that should have been my card.
Well a nice 45 minute break after lunch was much appreciated.

Me: Hello?
Them: Hi Mr Daigle...
Me: I'm sorry, no such person exists.
*click*

At least appologize for wasting my time!!!

After 8 days, I finally have my email back!
Of course, anything that was sent to me during that time was lost... stupid ISP.

Customer service week is this week!

My company became cheap, and said my department didn't get to be a part of it, which is funny because without us there'd be no custumers at all for the company (we could easily stop all catalogs... and the company would die). Everyone complained (excpet me, because in accounting, we go nothing... ever). So Mona, the big boss, decided we'd have our own.
It started Wednesday, free pizza, and everyone was subjected to play bozo's buckets. The department was broken down into 5 teams of 5.
My team the silly bucket game, thanks to me and Fiona. Only one person out of 25 got to bucket #6, and that's the pregnant woman who looks like she's about to spit out 17 babies. The winning team got scads of office supplies.
Playing the silly game cheered me up a lot, and I needed it, having had a fight with M a few hours before.

Thursday was dress in your pajama's day, and bingo. The bingo was... umm... not good. No one on my team one, it went too fast, and just wasn't fun for me. Oh well. I didn't get to wear pajama's, I don't have any real ones so... all I wore was my Winnie-the-Pooh slipper socks. No wait... that wasn't all I wore! I had to wear my normal work clothes too! You have a sick mind.
I was scorned and ridiculed for not wearing pajama's and for not running out and buying some to wear. Carlos, for some reason, wore a suit... I think he was confused.

Today was free chicken, miniature gold and silly hat day. I should have won one of the three prizes for best hat... but I didn't (I'm the new guy, and people still don't know my name), it was a jesters hat... what could be better. I walked around bobbing my head making the bells jingle all day.... well, maybe that's why I didn't win.
Two teams tied in the miniature golf game, nine holes designed by the graphic design area... nine hellish holes! I think the average number of strokes per hole was about 6-8, it took forever!
My team tied for first with the team that had all the bosses on it... eek.
A one whole tiebreaker... I was the last on my team to go... we were ahead by three points. Each person finished their ball and teams alternated.
My first shot was perfect... straight right to the cup, it went up the little ramp, hit the red painted flexi-straw flag,and bounced down the side into the little crevice between the ramps. This meant a minimum of 3, if I could pull it off we win (I should point out that one person on my team got a hole in one on this). Second shot was to line up the ball... simple enough I'd learned that with that carpet the ball rolls forever, so tap it lightly.
Third shot , if I made this we win! My nerves were clenched.
Aim...
Deep breath...
Swing backwards...
Hit the ball, not too hard!....
The ball went up the ramp, spun fully around the cup, and rolled down the opposite ramp.
A horrifying cry from my 4 teammates, and sighs of relief from the opposing team, stunned silence from the rest of the department.
Flex fingers, limber up my arms, take aim and put.... the ball dropped in the cup as if it belonged there. I fell to my knees and prayed thanks to some scottish god. I handed the club to Dave, my manager... the pressure was on, he needed a hole in one to tie.
25 people held their breath as the soft "smack" of club meeting ball filled the air. The ball rolled through the files, seemingly for an infinate time. The ball rolled up the ramp making it's way straight for the cup, it wavered slightly as it's momentum slowed, and as it just touched the top of the ramp, it seemed to stop... seconds passed, and the ball began rolling back from whence it came.
My teammates and I showered each other with champagne, and collected out winnings.... a $5 gift certificate to Blockbuster to each of us.
Look out Tiger Wood, I'm coming after you next....

I returned to my desk, and thought that I'd like to share this excitement with someone that means a lot to me... but things are bad between us now (I think), and either she wasn't home, or she was avoiding my call. It's now been almost 60 hours since we last talked, and I feel like I'm in Hell...

After signing up for the service Humbada suggested, I couldn't wait to get home and check the answering machine.
"You have 2 new messages."
Message one was a legitimate call from some guy at Adobe for my roommate, she hasn't returned his 6 calls yet... it's to help them test InDesign... she's stupid for not grabbing that ASAP.
The second message was a hangup...
This means one of two things...
1) The service works, and works well!
or 2) It's just a coincidence.

I'm opting for #1. Why? Because I've never had less than 6 hangup calls on a workday... not for over a year.
Sure, it might be coincidence... tomorrow will be the real test, two days in a row... let's see what happens.

Ok, I admit, I'd be extrememly surprised if it actually worked that fast... EXTREMELY surprised.

Sometimes I jsut wish I could rip my heart out and flush it down the toilet.
I am soooooo drunk right now, best if I don't write any more.

Numerous responses to my last post scream out for another post to the same topic! (yay)

To Luna:
I have said, "I'm not interested" a thousand times, they don't care, they keep talking. So I've hung up on them.
They called back saying, "we must have gotten disconnected."
I'm tired of their damned calls.

To Weezoh:
I refuse to pay for that service... yes, that may change. I'd rather pay for an unlisted number. I'll have to look into it.

To Mr Nosuch:
Yes, I'd heard that that is supposed to work. I was at a party, and very drunk... fact is that's the one thing I remember from this party.
I'd gotten return calls from companies that did this. It seems little point in suing over it, and I'm poor anyways so it's out of the question.

To Mark/Slyph:
I used to be polite and curt (then I changed my name to Richard). They just keep calling.
Turning my ringer off is out of the question... my roommates mother and grandmorther are (more or less) at deaths door. And she'd want to know if anything happens...
And I'm sorry I brought a call to your humble abode... although, I now I might just go back and sit outside near the phone line connection, and watch the fun reign down.

To Athala and Mark/Slyph:
Personally, I prefer the phone to email. I'd be on the phone all day if my life was in the least bit exciting.
I prefer conversations, rather than a list of comments... I'm really bad at it, but it's what I like.

To Humbaba:
Wow! You read this? I am humbled.
I will look into that link you gave... I hope it helps. Thanks.

To Elayne:
Who are you, and why do you read my blog? Not that I mind, but I'm curious. Mind if I link your blog to mine?
For you I give you the reason I'm so fed up with Telemarketers/Bill Collectors/Firemen/Policemen/etc....
I was home one Saturday all by myself, my roommate was in school. Here was my day.
8AM: Phone rings, " Hello, can I speak wtih Miss Daigle?"
Me, "She's not here now, can I take a message?"
Them, "No, this is just a courtesy call from some stupid credit card company."
8:10AM: Phone rings, "Hello, can I speak with Miss Daigle?"
Me, "She's not here now, can I take a message?"
Them, "No, this is just a courtesy call from some stupid credit card company. What time do you expect her back?"
Me, "Not until at least 3:30."
8:35AM: Phone rings, "Hello, can I speak with...."
Me, "she's still not here, like I just told you."
9AM: Phone rings, "Hello, can I speak with Miss Daigle?"
Me, "She's not here, please stop calling."
9:30AM: Phone rings, "Hello, can I speak with Miss Daigle?"
Me, "Please stop calling here, if you call back today I will sue."
10AM: Phone rings, "Hello, can I..."
*click*
10:01AM Phone rings... and ring... and rings... answering machine, "Hello Miss Daigle, this is your stupid credit card company, and we show that you last payment is" get this "2 days late. blah blah blah"
10:25AM Phone rings, thinking they'd finally left a message and I was safe, I answered.
"Hello can I please speak with Miss Daigle?"
Me, "Look, you've been calling since since early this morning, you woke me up, and you keep bothering me! If you call again you will be deaf." Sadly, I was fresh out of loud and obnoxious whistles.
10:35 Phone rings, "Hello, can..."
SLAM!

You get the picture... The times and exact wording are approximate, but you understand. There were 14 calls between 8AM and noon. I tried every possible tactic to get them to stop. It didn't work. I left the house at noon, because I couldn't take it any more. Miss Daigle's grandmother had just been hospitalized, and I needed to answer the phone just in case.

To Polerand:
Maybe I will just pick up and hang up, if they call back, I know it wasn't an auto dialer, at least.

To Elayne:
If I could kill them, I would be polite... but, sadly, I don't know where they are.

To Johnny:
I've tried to get them to give me money. It doesn't work, and most of the time they just keep up with their little schpiel.
I will donate to the fire department... because I don't want them to let my kitties and ferret to burn up, but that's it.

I think I covered about everyone, right? Hope so.
I've already registered with Humbada's recommendation. I'll keep my fingers crossed... I figure $5 for 5 years can't be too bad even if it doesn't work.

The last call I'll mention was a very aggravating one... I was forcing SingularGirl to watch the best movie of all time, Evil Dead II, when the phone rang.
"Hello."
Her, "Can I please speak to Richard?"
Me, "May I ask what this is in regards to?"
Her, "Can I please speak to Richard?"
Me, "Not until you tell me what this is about."
Her, "Please let me speak to Richard."
Me, "umm... no."
Her, "Why can't I speak to Richard."
Me, "You can talk to him when I'm done screening this call."
Her, "Please just let me speak to Richard."
Me, "Tell me why the hell you need to speak to him."

And it went on, until I got all mad and pissy, and SingularGirl became more afraid of me then she was of the movie (which was good, because the movie isn't scary at all).


~finis~

AT&T broadband still sucks! Well, actually it's my roommate.

Last month I asked my roommate to cover the cable bill, all my money problems meant there was one bill I couldn't pay until my bank gave me back my money. So... I get this months bill and what do I learn? You got it!

Me: Deb, did you pay the bill?
Deb: No, did you want me to?
Me: Well, yeah... that discussion we had when I told you I was going to put the bill with your stuff should have been the big tip off.
Deb: Oh, did you want me to pay it now?

Little point, since I now have the money for it.

So I send the check out Monday. Today, my email goes down... everything works but email.
Brad: AT&T Broadband customer service, this is Brad how can I help you?
Me: Why is my email suspended?
Brad: I show your account is what we call a soft down due to a late payment.
Me: So, I won't have access until you get the check?
Brad: Well, you could pay by a credit card right now...
Me (cutting Brad off): Why the hell would I do that when you'll probably get the check Monday?
Brad: Well, it would get you access to your email.
Me: What, you think I'm such a loser that I can't live without my email for a few days?
Brad: errrr


I'm having just as much fun with sales people too...
Idiot: Hello Richard, this is somebody-or-other from Providian Financial and I show your paying 117% on your home mortgage...
Me: When did my finances become your business?
Idiot: Well, we just thought you might like to save....
Me: Don't call me again until you know for sure.

Providian called ealier in the week, I got the phone just as the answering machine kicked on. As soon as I knew it was a salesperson, I ran into the room with the answering machine, held the phone up to it and let the feedback take control of the situation.

Tuesday I had my favorite... which is sad because I was so angry at the stupid company, which I didn't even bother to find out who they were, bummer.
*ring ring*
Me: Hello?

Recording: Hi, I have a very important message for you but all of our associates are busy right now, please stay on the line for a very important message.

Foolish dupe: Hello?
Me: What the fuck was that? YOU call me and expect me to wait on the line for YOU? How dare you have the audacity to expect people with busy lives to sit and wait on the phone while you sit there drinking your goddamned coffee! I have guests over tongiht, and they are sitting there waiting for me while I'm stuck here waiting to yell at you. Let me speak to your supervisor.
Foolish dupe: He's not.......
Me: Then give me the name and the number of the owner of your supid little company.

*69 woudln't give me the number. I wonder if I could have gotten it from the operator... hmm... I'll have to remember that next time.

Yes, I know I could easily get rid of all these calls... but it's $5 a month for that service, plus you need caller ID which is another $5. Why should I give the phone company more money.... they make more than enough money, and will be laying off well over 1000 people this year... we're told to "expect the quality of the service to decline." Isn't that just great!

I wasn't always this mean to sales people... but I come home at night and there's always at least 10 messages that are hangups. And 5 more calls by the end of the night. I need to get a phone that has some kind of feedback attachment that blows up the phone on the other end.... that would be wonderful.