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Bless This Big Brother House

July 27th, 2007 · No Comments · Religion, TV

I don’t think I keep it secret that on my cynical days, I’m an atheist, and on my more humble days I’ll cop to being agnostic. I do respect other people’s religions, as long as they don’t try to spill any of it on me, and I do know a few people who are truly deeply spiritual and devote themselves to good works, and I admire them for it.

With that being said, I’d like to say to all of you people competing on Big Brother 8 (or any other reality TV game), that if there were a God, He wouldn’t give a shit about whether you win or lose. The outcome of any head-of-household challenges, veto competitions, or elimination voting is not in God’s hands. It’s in the hands of the producers, maybe, or even your fellow players, or perhaps in your hands. But I’m pretty sure even if the Pope were playing Big Brother, he wouldn’t be mistaken in thinking that the result of food competition was God’s will.

Going on some reality show and claiming that the Almighty is tuned in and rooting for you, or perhaps should even intervene on your behalf, doesn’t make you look spiritual, or even religious, it makes you like a self-centered ass who thinks God is nothing more than a Fairy Godfather who grants wishes to his favorites. Not exactly the deepest spiritual or philosophical model to base your faith upon if you ask me.

Yes, I’m looking at you Amber, and you too Kail. But, I’ve spoken to the Flying Spaghetti Monster about both of you, and His Noodliness has assured me he’ll take care of it so that neither of you win.

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